Hope is still in the air

I used to think that I will never find true love. Yes, I met throngs of men, some were attractive some were not nevertheless I always give them the chance they deserve.

Out of many relationships I had, there was this particular guy who really broke my heart. Initially I was the one who wanted to break his heart knowing that I am not more than just a roller coaster ride for him. He did not see me for the person I want him to see.

I should have known form the moment he asked what sex position do I like the most. He even asked me to send him a naked picture of me. Before you gasp, let me tell you. I did not. I am not stupid.

Despite all that I was so blind by .. I don’t really know. It could be his persona and his aura because I wouldn’t that he’s that good looking (still the most good looking amongst my exes) but there’s something about him that made girls turned their head to look at him twice.

So when the relationship ended, I was crushed, crestfallen. I told him I wanted to leave since I didn’t see any future in the relationship. Perhaps I should be more blatant; perhaps I should just say “Marry me”.

He let me go like a snap and never even call me anymore.

Foolishly I thought he was irreplaceable.

I went through a very hard time, especially not too long after that I found out that he reconciled with his ex who is a fucking surgeon. How am I able to compete?

Well that was me then. Neurotic and pathetic.

The reason why I am writing this piece of crap is simply because I want to say that, I am glad he did what he did and I am glad I did what I did.

If not for that experience, that pang of bitterness I would never find the guy I am dating today.

He was nothing like the guy who broke my heart.

Not good looking, not even a bit.
Not popular.
Not a head turner.
No special aura.

But one thing for sure.

He made my heart feel the warmth again.

Just Because I Am Not Old Enough

My parents never educate me to be disrespectful especially to the elderly but at times I can’t help being boorish to them. If I could, I would really want to give them a piece of my mind followed by series of backhands. Not because it’s in my genetics to beat old people but because some elderly people seems to think that they are always right. All the time and you, younger people, know nothing therefore you have to kiss my ass . I personally think everybody should be treated evenly and everybody should be given and earn respect equally despite age or gender.

The story that I am about to tell you will comprise my best friend, Ah Kong and his daddy. Ah Kong family is staying outside KL but they always come to KL to visit. Every time when they touch down, Ah Kong will always asks me to accompany him although he knows his sister who is also working here can drive his parents around. Despite being a guy, Ah Kong is a moron when it comes to finding routes in KL, thus I became his walking GPS or should I say talking map. Occasionally Ah Kong ticks me off, I lost track of how many times I taught him the routes in KL but my attempt always meet failure.

Last month, Ah Kong parents came down again and they checked in at the Le Meridian. It was Friday and we were at Jalan Ampang, settling some stuff when Ah Kong father called saying he wanted to meet him at KLCC although the initial plan was to let Ah Kong meet them at the hotel. That was Ah Kong idea since he didn’t want to drive and we didn’t drive to Jalan Ampang, we took the public transport even the fact that their service sucks. On Friday, the jam in KL is atrocious, that’s why.

Ah Kong tried to forbid his father from driving (the father was using the sister’s car) to KLCC but being a stubborn old man, he insisted saying, he needed to eat at Little Penang, which according to my opinion, didn’t make sense at all since Little Penang is also located at Midvalley, about 10 minutes from Meridian or one stop away from the commuter. Even then, the father can always take LRT but no, he wanted to drive.

To make things worst, it was raining when we met them at KLCC ( I had to tag along because Ah Kong is a moron on the road remember?). The thing is, the father wanted to be the navigator while Ah Kong drove and totally shun me as if I am from New Zealand who doesn’t know anything about KL routes. I didn’t initially mind it at all, just that he didn’t bloody know the mutherfucking way and I do. Okay, he used to study in Universiti Malaya therefore he claimed that he know all the road in KL but hello uncle, that was like fucking 30 years ago and if case you didn’t notice, there are loads of skyscraping building in KL now that not only make an outsider like you get puzzled but also blinding a cosmopolitanites like me.

He keep changing his mind by saying “left,, no no.go right..no noo take the other way” and he forced his poor son to speed up, worst, the thing that I hated the most, instructed the son not to give ways to toher drivers by saying “This is KL, you cannot be so nice and slow!”

No wonder lots of people are behaving like monkey on the road!

Oh yes, we got lost, got stuck in the horrendous Friday traffic and not to mention the heavy rain. And he kept saying

“I didn’t know that the jam is going to be this bad”

Can I stick the gear into your ass uncle? Did your son not told you not to drive here in KL when it goddammit Friday?

Why was I mad you asked? Because I had some other things to settle and I really wanted to pee, so bad. In case you are wondering I did not say anything at all. So did his mother who sat next to me.

Alas, we reached Meridian after few hours stuck in the jam and by that time, the uncle turn around to look at me and ask” Did we get lost? No right?” with a smug in his face.

Oh. My. Goat.

Can you guess my feeling at that moment? I bet you can.

I really, really wanted to say “Hell yeah, almost” but instead I said no, just for Ah Kong sake. After all, he’s my best friend and I will have to respect his daddy for that matter.

That is just another story that I have from many. The thing is, why..why can’t we get respect that we deserve just because we are not old enough?