Hope is still in the air

I used to think that I will never find true love. Yes, I met throngs of men, some were attractive some were not nevertheless I always give them the chance they deserve.

Out of many relationships I had, there was this particular guy who really broke my heart. Initially I was the one who wanted to break his heart knowing that I am not more than just a roller coaster ride for him. He did not see me for the person I want him to see.

I should have known form the moment he asked what sex position do I like the most. He even asked me to send him a naked picture of me. Before you gasp, let me tell you. I did not. I am not stupid.

Despite all that I was so blind by .. I don’t really know. It could be his persona and his aura because I wouldn’t that he’s that good looking (still the most good looking amongst my exes) but there’s something about him that made girls turned their head to look at him twice.

So when the relationship ended, I was crushed, crestfallen. I told him I wanted to leave since I didn’t see any future in the relationship. Perhaps I should be more blatant; perhaps I should just say “Marry me”.

He let me go like a snap and never even call me anymore.

Foolishly I thought he was irreplaceable.

I went through a very hard time, especially not too long after that I found out that he reconciled with his ex who is a fucking surgeon. How am I able to compete?

Well that was me then. Neurotic and pathetic.

The reason why I am writing this piece of crap is simply because I want to say that, I am glad he did what he did and I am glad I did what I did.

If not for that experience, that pang of bitterness I would never find the guy I am dating today.

He was nothing like the guy who broke my heart.

Not good looking, not even a bit.
Not popular.
Not a head turner.
No special aura.

But one thing for sure.

He made my heart feel the warmth again.